Friday, March 5, 2010

Happy Birthday Aubrey!

This is the first picture we took of Aubrey & Ky in our home...with a camera phone. It's not the best quality, but I love the emotion.

Two years ago today I gave birth to my second bouncing baby girl-after swearing I would never and I mean NEVER have another baby...ever again. Proof that time truly does heal all-even the trauma of pregnancy and new mommy-hood.

I have said it and said it and will most likely continue to say it-Aubrey has really changed me.

In June of last year I posted this, "Aubrey came into this world and I was older...and dare I say wiser and she softened my heart and opened my eyes to the joy of my motherhood experience. I feel I have come into my own with motherhood. I am embracing my faults and accepting my limitations and simply trying harder to enjoy my children-living in the moment and truly realizing joy in this journey." I have truly come so far in the past two years.

As I wrapped Aubrey's presents Thursday night I got a little teary eyed. Thinking back about her and her journey into our family--Aubrey is my little miracle. Not just the whole science behind birth junk, but recognizing the hand of the Lord in my life at that time. I had no plans to have another baby-none. 2007 was a hard, hard year. My heart was broken over tragic events that transpired with my brother. These events and experiences changed my outlook, changed what I thought was important to me. I found myself unsure of my path and my desires in life. I felt really lost and I felt a lot of pain.  I was searching for peace and answers and meaning. I yearned for healing and desperatly wanted to recover from the unrecoverable pain and sorrow I felt and get myself back on track.  I prayed and listened and prayed again when the answer was "have a baby" and just for good measure I prayed yet again :). That answer was odd and very unexpected. But, I listened and Aubrey came. She brought my heart joy and my focus moved from fixing me and dealing with my pain to caring for my baby. After Aubrey my life came into focus. I felt peace and happiness, which after these events was truly a miracle. A miracle I understand now and I am utterly grateful for, but is difficult to explain in words.

Happy Birthday Aubrey Mae. You and your sister are the light of my life. You bring me purpose and happiness and I love you.


Shane and Meriel said...

Oh man girl you made me cry one more time. I am so proud of you and I need to thank you for the joy that you and your family have given me. I have been telling some one in my life the true joy of being a grandmother and I am so gratefull for have those 2 little girls to share love and laughter with. Being a grandmother makes every thing so much better, trust me.

Christy said...

Happy Birthday Aubs!! Yea for being 2...I love her for doing everything that you have so beautifully posted here - she truly has made your family complete.

Sad we couldn't be there to celebrate...GO MARINERS :)

Tiffany Bills said... are such an amazing person and I know where Kylie and Aubrey get their great personalities from! You inspire me, you motivate me, and you are an example in ways you don't even know. Thanks for sharing your thoughts...they are very much appreciated!
Happy Birthday Aubrey, Ty and I love you :)

Jill said...

It was really hard not being there this year for Aubs 2nd bday. Time flys and my heart aches that I am not just a hop skip and a jump away. (perhaps one day) I hate missing everything the girls do. Family is just to precious, and as I get older being so far away gets harder and harder. I am so blessed to have you as my sister, and to have the cutest funniest prettiest nieces ever..hope to see you soon. XOXO

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Paul and I have been married 10 years. We have two beautiful little girls, Kylee and Aubrey. We are blessed with a great family and amazing friends. Life is good!